This post is a continuation of my first post, Black Women and Solidarity, which is a post questioning the validity in such a statement that we, as black women, have each others backs and are for each other. In that post, I brought up a couple of experiences in which, I was rejected and blocked from voicing my opinion and asking questions to black women, by black women. I had two experiences which I detailed in the post, and I couldn’t understand why I was received so negatively by those black women. It was puzzling, so I had to vent and write about it.
Fast forward a year later. I rejoined a fetish website which is like Facebook for the kinky last month and joined a few groups. One of the groups is an Afro-Centric based group where there are lots of black people discussing kink and politics. I decided to start a couple of threads. One thread, regarding sex trafficking in the black community, got quite a few responses, mainly from black men. I asked why sex abuse and sex trafficking is so normalized in our community. There was no arguing or telling me to go fuck off. Instead, there was a dialogue between me and mostly black men about black issues. I did take note, however, that the men’s responses were nearly identical. Their responses revolved around ‘if white people can do it, so can we’, it’s the white man’s fault, and something about slavery…as usual. Nonetheless, I was actually grateful to have such a dialogue amongst black people about our issues.
The next thread I started, well, it didn’t get off the ground. It was labeled ‘Black Women and Solidarity’. I asked the question of whether or not BET is lying to the world with all of the Black Girl That Rock mess. Do we really rock, and are we really so solid?
Well, a lady that I mentioned in my first post, respectfully of course, made the whole thread about her. The whole thread became the ‘old Heaux Show’ to be quite honest. I never disrespected her, only called her mistress-y. I actually used to admire her from afar, but she made sure to let me see who she really is.
Irregardless, the lady wanted to have my thread closed for posing a simple question to black women. This would have made the 3rd time that I had been shut out from communicating with black women, by black women.
I’d had enough, so I went completely off! Having that incident be the 3rd time that black women have done this to me, I had to give them some truth. I had come to a realization that the root problem of all the problems in the black community…start with the black woman! How can the black community blame white people, black men, society, etc., when the problem lies in the heads of the majority of black households??
Here was my response:
Mod.. Please delete or french this toast, I mean, post. thank you.
Alright ladies. Thanks for answering my question. We can’t get along. We won’t get along. We are defensive of each other. There’s no way to have an intellectual conversation with each other because we refuse to listen and understand. I was never being accusatory, but basically wanting to pique the interests of the black woman’s mind.
It has become clear that we fail to understand each other. I was assuming that this discussion would lead to talks on our commonality, yet uniqueness. I wanted to know if there was a way to get through to the black woman by asking her about herself. I wasn’t attacking anyone, I am just honest. Just because I say your name, does not mean I hate you, or have anything against you.
What’s wrong with this picture? BOLD CAPS and everything! lol
Intellectual discussion is impossible. We must argue and fight first, then make nice? That’s not intelligent.
Is there a wonder why we are so alone and mad at the world, covering it up with makeup and slim waists…or great sex? How can someone talk to you like a woman, when you’re a bitch? Are the words we say to each other on a daily basis ingrained in our psyche, so we become those things? Is this the foundation of the black community? Black women? Is this the problem to begin with? How can we create solutions on our community when black women are the heads of households and the ones who uphold our community? No wonders it’s in shambles.
We as women, black women are the sources of the dismay in the black community. No one can talk to you and ask you what’s on your mind without you getting offended. These women are considered elders of the community? Who respects this? Shameful!
You can close the thread now. It really is pointless.
See how pointless this thread is now. It’s slimy now that I had the audacity to ask black women questions. I am thankful for the one response that was unbiased and answered the question to a point. At least she got it.
This is now MistressC’s thread. It’s all about you, doll.
No serious discussions for black women. I’ll just talk with the guys. We always have interesting discussions, even if we disagree. I consider that intelligent. No wonder they need white girls…lol
They need someone to listen to them, and to talk to…
I’m a guy’s gal anyway, so I really apologize for wanting to start a conversation with you gals. My bad. I should have learned after the second time a thread of mine was closed. This will make the 3rd time black women have shut my conversations down.
Good luck with raising the community on your own…
Who is really at fault in raising thug ass niggas and trap queens and hoes? Who is making this an acceptable way of living? Who’s creating values that last for generations? Why are they alone and unwanted by their own men, yet they are the only ones who don’t realize it??
All of the resentment and anger has to be taken out on somebody…their children! This creates abused, bitter, unloved people who continue the cycle of insanity that the black woman has created for her family?
I mean, if I am rejected and blocked for asking a simple question to black women, how is it not possible to think that the issues going on in the black community continue because these heffers don’t want to listen? What are they trying to hide by blocking an intelligent black woman from communicating with them?
It’s really sad that every time I want to admire a black woman, she, herself, disappoints me, and blocks me from her life.
I have been searching for reasons as to why black people are stuck mentally and have the value systems that they do, because of who is raising them.
Is there any wonder why all of these black teens are being murdered in the streets? Why are they not at home with their mother? Are the streets safer??
Why do so many black people go by nicknames? Do they pride the names their friends give them over the name their mother named them ( Sometimes these ghetto names ruin their childrens’ lives… might as well go by Pookie.)
How is it possible for the black community to blame their problems on other people, places and races when they are living day to day with black women, who are the matriarches of the black community. Don’t they get blamed for something? They do all the teaching. They are teachers to the black community. Is there any wonder why so many rap songs call them bitch? Is that why trap and gangster rap is so popular? Mothers approve! Black women are the creators of all that is wrong with the black community. They enable such behavior that is detrimental to the community.
How are black women NOT to be blamed for all of their thug ass children being incarcerated at such great percentages, or for thinking that being a trap star is a viable source of income, irregardless of jail time, or for all these hoes running around, talking about the game been good to them. Their moms weren’t. Speaking of hoes, why do little black girls make up 40% of sex trafficking victims? What is the black mother doing?
How are black women NOT to be blamed for all of this black on black crime? To kill at the rate blacks do to each other, there has to be some emotional issues afoot. Women are emotional. I’m just adding this crap up. It all makes sense to me.
My assessment is that black women are the problem with the black community. There’s no way around it.
What do you, my reader, think about this?